• OUR SO CALLED PRACTICAL WORLD
Yes I have become a recluse I prefer my books and solitude to party and crowd. My solitude is named as loneliness and I as a bookworm. Plastering that fake smile and having animated conversations is named as socializing. People have started wearing masks that fit in so well that it is just so impossible to know what that real person is like behind that facade. “I Trust
You”, “ I Will Be With You” have become mere words instead of solid promises. Practicality has replaced love, feelings are known as complications and being in a relationship just a pass time. Commitments are seen as burdens and promises are made that often break. Life means Money, Power and Lust because money has replaced conscience, power has replaced relationships and innocence is replaced by lust. Our respect for our parents seems to have taken a backseat, because their protectiveness is named as narrow mindedness and their back breaking hard work for our upbringing is seen as a mere responsibility towards towards us. Beauty means a fair skin even though the soul is dark. Beauty means a spotless face even though the thoughts are scarred. Wrinkles seem to be ugly but we have forgotten that there is a vast sea of experience beyond those wise though weak and glassy eyes. Our definitions for beauty would have been so much more beautiful if our ideals for beauty would have been a bit more different. Friendship was synonymous to trust, but here comes a time where stamp papers are not enough to keep intact the promises once made the words once spoken. Time passes people change we ourselves change, carefree childhood turns into harsh adulthood. Soda became vodka, bicycles have become bikes. Remember when dad’s shoulder was the highest place on earth and mom was our hero. Wars were only in movies and races were only in car games. The worst pain was skinning your knees and goodbyes only meant till tomorrow and we couldn’t wait to grow up. Yes this is the so called practical world where even your shadows leave you when the sky goes dark. And here when I speak for myself
Not one but all say they have my back but when I look back even the shadows melt in the darkness. I fly to the moon but all I get are the stars though in constellations they are scattered though beautiful they are still broken. My body seems sensual but the sensitivity is missing from the soul when I love I am told to be practical and when I try to balance things not only my priorities seem different but my broken heart has turned into a stone and I know nothing about emotions. When online they reply within seconds and when met close and personal they don't even look at you. Hundreds of friends on social networking sites but not one around to cry with. When I smile they say I don't care when I cry I care way too much. Why don't I find balance but those scales are also set by you and your convenience. “This world is a BEAUTIFUL place” to “The world out there is very BAD we all grew up.” Back then stars were loved but now 3:am is a difficult time. The morning brought a new start but now it's a worse nightmare. Peace is searched in Yoga and meditation because somewhere down the lane we don't like our own company. If I dance with you in your party I am fun if I write about life after going home I am boring. If I think too much I over think If I think a little less I am careless. Loving myself is selfish but loving you should be unconditional. If I don't Judge I don't have an opinion and if I do my thoughts are not modern. One night stand is cool but making love is way too soon. Yes it's true that today as I sit under the half hidden moon on the top of my roof I think of this world which is still dim in the sunlight.
RUTANSHI SHAH
